It's been quite the journey... And, now-- it continues. I'm rounding a corner.
In less than 3 hours, I will be officially 40 weeks pregnant, with nothing but an even bigger bump to show for it.
I blame my silly hubby for getting my hopes up and having all of these bogus theories about me going into labor at 38 weeks or some such nonsense. He has predicted numerous days to be the day our child greets the world. But, so far, baby Ezra hasn't liked any of those options.
My measurements have been the same for the past two weeks. 1 cm dilated, 70% effaced, and the baby's head at -1 station. The doctors seem to think that those numbers are magical and that I could go into labor at any moment. I usually leave their office feeling a bit less optimistic than all of that.
The weeks are getting increasingly hard. My energy is depleting more each day and so is my patience. I'm not, what most people would describe as, stressed-- just anxious. Anxious to see what my body can really do as far as labor and delivery, anxious to hold my baby and look at his face for the first time (a face that is, for now, a mystery to me), and have his little tiny fingers wrapped around just one of mine. Not to mention the look on Jon's face when he see's it all happen. Having gone through the whole emergency c-section, terrifying newborn health situation, and then having a 6.5 year old who is basically a grown up compared to changing a poopy, size 1 diaper... It's gonna be a completely new experience.
I'm getting tired of people calling me every day to ask if I'm "STILL pregnant" or say, "Haven't you had that baby yet?!" Especially when most of them are family members that would be informed the moment something happened. Most people are also convinced that because DH is so tall (6'2") and weighed 10 lbs, 6oz at birth, that our child is going to be a mammoth. I hear numerous times a week about how humongous our child is going to be. Or how late.
Even when I went shopping the other day, the lady checking my items at Victoria's Secret seemed to be an EXPERT in the fact that most 1st babies are late. While it's true that 70% of all babies are born after their due date, I don't need reminded of that every five seconds!
What's really funny is, after all of the talking THEY do they say, "Well, don't be too worried or stressed out. The baby will come when it's ready." REALLY? I didn't have a clue. -_-
If maybe, just maybe, I could get away from all that talking I would be completely fine with my baby boy waiting this thing out and letting me know whenever he is ready to make his grand entrance. And I'm sure with all the pain I'm in now, a grand entrance it will be!
Between all that and DH's mom & dad in town and wanting to come over all the time, and the awkward relationship (or lack thereof) that I already have with his sister-in-law heading into uncharted waters, I'm just a little sleep deprived, tense, and moody. Jon has literally been such a doll and told me to complain as much as I wanted. Poor thing-- I don't think he understood what that meant. Haha. He is basically my life coach right now and I don't know what I'd do without him.
So, with my due date tomorrow, I'm just sitting here drinking in the fact that hubs is cleaning the kitchen for me and my whole house smells like french vanilla creamer, and wondering- Where is Baby McConnell?
I really don't know what to say...
I'm 38 weeks + 3 days (almost 4) and honestly, I won't lie, I was hoping- maybe even expecting- to be done being pregnant by now. It never occurred to me that I could take this thing to 39 or 40 weeks. It just seemed impossible!
I have about had it with this nerve pain that stems from the root around my tailbone and all the way down my left butt cheek.
It is getting progressively worse and neither hubby nor I can think of anything to do for it, besides putting on a moist heat pad. But, even with that, I couldn't get out of bed this morning without searing pain; wincing and moaning with every movement. (Really the only complaint I have right now, though, so that says a lot!)
Remember the post I put up a couple of weeks ago about detox baths. Well, I decided to research a little on good ingredients for aromatherapy baths and teas and muscle/pain relief... Here's a recipe I came up with all on my own and it was REALLY helpful.
Quin's Pregnancy Pain Potion Bath
5 bags of green tea
1 bag peppermint tea
Lavender essential oil (mine is already measured out, but you probably don't need more than 2-3 drops)
1 tsp of ground ginger
1 cup Epsom salts
1/2 cup of honey
These ingredients are supposed to be good for drawing out toxins, loosening stiff areas, easing pain, taking away stress, softening dry/dead skin, toning, and fighting fatigue. I don't think you can go wrong even if this bath only does one of those things for you!
Well, Pinterest has done it again.
I am counting down the days until I can enjoy a full on workout at the gym again. These prenatal pilates are great for conditioning pre-labor and delivery, but I'm ready to go back to my kick-butt boot camp pilates teacher, Amy. If anyone is an inspiring mom, it's her. She has 3 children and looks absolutely ripped!Unfortunately, in my condition, I have another 4 months until it's okay for me to play at one of my old sessions. :( My muscles are killer right now and my bones, especially in my ribs and lower back. I feel like I'm growing a cancer, not a baby-- I'm completely exhausted. Not to mention I am FINALLY starving (been waiting for that feeling) all the time, as I mentioned last week. But, I am having a hard time deciding what to eat still. If any of you have been following this blog regularly you are probably SO sick of hearing about that by now! And in that case, you can imagine how I feel living it on a daily basis.
Jon has been such a HUGE helper. He plays Mr. Mom so well (although he has had practice...) that he never hesitates to step up and make dinner (which he has done SO many nights while I've been pregnant), or let me nap. He has gotten up so many times to change peed on sheets, take the dogs for a walk... He even got on his hands and knees to mop the floor for me because, according to him, I'm "too pregnant". Such a great hubby!
Today I went for my one hour glucose test... Drank a bottle of what tasted like carbonated Gatorade and waiting in a tiny room full of multiple other pregnant woman, who looked like they wanted to rip their hair out and many of which had other small children with them, to get my blood drawn. I dread getting a phone call telling me that I need to come back for a more extensive three hour test, which points to the probability that I have gestational diabetes; the last thing I need to deal with. Though, I haven't had any excessive swelling or weight gain; major symptoms to look for = avoided thus far.
After that, I had to scurry across the street to my OB appointment for a "tummy check". [A little background, the practice at which I am being treated has about 13 doctors housed there. It is the goal of that office for all of their pregnant patients to see as many of those doctors as possible, seeing as how any of them could be the one that delivers your child. Had I thought about that before becoming an established patient there, I might have chosen to go somewhere with only one doctor following me so that the visits might be a little more personal and maybe more than five minutes, after you've waited for 30-40. Hindsight is 20/20... But, since I've been going there for 26 weeks and 3 days, I should bring out that they are taking good care of me.]
So far, I have gained 24/25 pounds; still under what one of the doctors predicted! I am hearing from them that the average weight gain now is 20 lbs in the first twenty weeks and additional 20 in the duration of your pregnancy. Fortunately, I have not gained that fast! Nor do I want to.
I was told I look perfect, Ezra's heartbeat is "beautiful", and that I don't have another appointment until the first week of January! (Thank goodness for a healthy baby!) They also started measuring my tummy today. It's exactly where it should be; 27... inches? Centimeters? I don't remember... But, now I can rest easy until the next time.
My mom is getting on my nerves now... She has no filter it seems. (Must be where I get it from!)
She calls or texts me at least once a week giving me alternative baby names for Ezra! Now, I don't know about you but, I'm not really fond of someone trying to change my child's name just because THEY don't care for it. It's MY kid. I told her, in the early 1990's when she was walking around telling everyone that her daughter's name was Quintana, they probably looked at her like she was nuts! She confirmed my speculation.
It's my reasoning, too, that a child grows into their name. I, almost 21 yrs later, couldn't go around telling people my name is Ashley and make it believable. Ha!
Ezra's room is coming together slowly, but surely. We have yet to paint and such, but getting the details together is the fun part! We got a beautiful Eames 1960's/70's style dresser which was a major stress now lifted; and it cost a fraction of the price. (Pictures and vendors will be supplied as soon as the room is finished!)
I had to share this cute little guy (to the left) though! One of my best friends, Jade, pinned a photo of this on pinterest last week and I couldn't resist clicking on it. For the love of owls!
It is a ceramic speaker that works with any mp3 player. I am so excited!!
Hubby and I have been compromising left and right with each other to make this room what the other one wants. I think it's gonna turn out great!
Well, I'm off to finish dinner for the fam before we all perish from hunger! I'll be sharing recipes soon!
of Highlands, Utah first grabbed my attention when it came to photos of giving birth.
If you'd have asked me a few years ago if I would even attempt to give
birth I would've said no, let alone the idea of someone photographing me doing it. And even now that I'm pregnant, sometimes when I think about it makes me a little jumpy; I might end up punching the poor photographer in the face. Plus, being a photographer myself, I know just how much the pressure would be on.
When I first started thinking about having a baby, I was always looking at maternity, newborn, and quirky post-natal items I thought where cool. (Click here to see my 'bump starter' pinterest board)
In the process, I came across these amazing pictures of baby Wil's birth story. None of the photos were invasive, graphic, or offensive and it made me look at the delivery process in an entirely new light.
Now that the birth of our little booger is getting nearer I keep thinking more and more about how much I would like documentation of that day. Nothing distasteful or gross...
I think the entire idea is becoming a bit more trendy and accepted, as I've seen a number of photographers in my area and all over the country offering sessions like this. I would love to offer a session like this!! Especially after I give birth to my own child and know the ins and outs of the progression.
Hubby is a bit weirded out by the entire thought of having someone in the room and would rather just set up a camcorder in the corner. I don't like that idea because at least when you review your photos it's SILENT and you don't have to hear all of the pain you went through to get your little miracle. There are so many tender moments that a family shares in welcoming their new addition into the world; how sentimental it would be to look back on those prized possessions years later!
A friend of mine told me to remember it on the little camcorder in my head, haha. But, I'm such a sucker and driven by emotion... I can't imagine how tear-jerking and nostalgic those pictures would be... Still-frames will always be my favorite way to capture a moment. No black & white memory could ever do the moment you meet your new son/daughter justice. Or the small instant when your first child realizes they are a brother/sister and hold their new sibling for the first time.
Ahhh! I don't really think you guys understand the crazy adrenaline running through me as I write this! Regardless, of whether I can talk Jon into doing it or not, or how much it costs... I will ALWAYS think this is a good idea.
I've watched quite a number of birth videos, and read experiences, and heard true life stories from family/friends; I feel like this is a personal choice like everything is. Just like having a midwife or a doula, or having your baby at home vs a birthing center vs a hospital. But, it's definitely a once in a lifetime adventure. <3
I'm currently in bed as I write this because I'm so exhausted I feel like it would be a waste of energy to get up and go to my computer. I cancelled all my appointments for this morning as it is. Zero sleep last night and an early morning... They mixed way better a few years ago when I was 18 and single, and way more paranoid about how I would look if I just decided to blow something off.
Week 23 has been an eventful on thus far. After our long weekend trip to Ohio & our first baby shower for Ezra I was sorely deprived of sleep. To get up early and come home, plus have my friend Zoe come back with us for the week... It seems like I get more tired, uncomfortable, and out of breath every day.
Monday I had an "I can't do this" breakdown and just wanted my pregnancy to be over... Sometimes 3 months more sounds like an eternity! And other times I feel like I need all that time to be prepared. Our stroller is put together but a baby can't sleep in that! Lol
I've also noticed I've got a shy boy on my hands. Ezra kicks and moves A LOT throughout the day. Sometimes it's so much that I have to just sit very still until he stops. But, today I'm disappointed because every time I make Jon rush over to feel the movement or wake him up in the night/early morning to put his hand on my belly, the baby stops moving and won't move again for a little while after Daddy takes his hand away. So sad that it happens like that because I want Jon to feel as much of a part of this pregnancy as possible.
A friend told me that it's only down hill from here... I really hope that's not the case. For the most part I have really enjoyed being pregnant! I don't have half of the problems a typical pregnant woman would complain of or characteristics you read in the mom-to-be books.
I guess for that reason alone I'll just sing "We Are The Champions" on my way to fulfill yet another bagel craving & look forward to the 6 month mark!
We bought a crib today!! So excited!! The exact crib from the inspiration room that I've been wanting for forever! Jenny Lind. Vintage. White. I'm in love with it!
It was a hard sell to talk hubby into WHITE. He thought white was only for girls and kept going for dark wood ones that looked more like our adult bedroom furniture than something for a baby. Granted, I'm not a fan of pastel blue and babyfied animal prints, but I also don't want Ezra to look like he is growing up in an office (which is what his room is currently used for).
I think right now the retro/vintage dynamic and the fun colors we are going for are the best and I can't believe I ran across something so perfect at Lay Baby Lay
. They have some AMAZING inspiration pieces over there and the blog owner is SO friendly.
We got the crib from Craigslist and while you may ask why I would want a used crib for my 1st biological child, the fact is that this crib hasn't been used at all! It was listed about 3-4 weeks ago and when I first saw it I immediately wanted to go pick it up, but hubby was still in need of some convincing. After looking at HUNDREDS of hideous baby furniture websites or cribs I adored but wouldn't be able to afford in this lifetime or the next, we decided to text the phone number listed on the Craigslist ad. Fortunately, it was still available! BUT, Jon still wanted to wait and see what else we could find.
With much unwillingness, I agreed to go along with it, just to make sure there wasn't anything out there I was missing out on. Meanwhile, the rest of the cribs on Craigslist were very used and something I could get at Target full-price for the same as what was being asked used. I kept thinking that we would never get our baby's room started. We only just decided to stay in this house and keep renting, while Ezzy will be here in 3 months!
Today, by pure accident, the owner of the Jenny Lind crib I had originally fallen in love with text me today with 3-4 pictures of the crib and said she hoped she was texting the lady who had inquired about the mattress that came with... Honestly, I was surprised that it wasn't already sold. Jon told me to tell her we would come look at it/pick it up right away if she was up for it and she agreed. (Before doing so, I called the store where the crib was originally from and asked them what they sold it for there. Turned out it was a special order. Retail price? $199.00 + 7% tax and you had to pick it up at their location. Almost $250 if you count the gas there and back!) Shannon, the owner, had all of the original packaging for the crib and mattress and her 4 month old, adorable son had never even slept a full night in it. Once they set it up in his room, she and her husband decided that they didn't like it anymore. So, we drove off with a crib and a mattress (over $300 value) for $150! I don't think my day could've gone better!
Now we just await the approval of Century 21 and the homeowners to let us know if we can paint the baby's room the color we want. I am praying that they don't say no as that would give me incentive to change my mind AGAIN and say that we are moving so I can paint my kid's room whatever the heck I want. It's hard to know what to do nowadays with the economy changing so much and the price of real estate on a continuous roller coaster... Sometimes I get so stressed out about it that I just sit there and cry because I don't know what the best decision is for me and my family.
Even though Jon is the 'breadwinner' we have always made all of our decisions together; even when we were dating. I think it wears both of us down to consider the next step for the 4 of us...