I'm 38 weeks + 3 days (almost 4) and honestly, I won't lie, I was hoping- maybe even expecting- to be done being pregnant by now. It never occurred to me that I could take this thing to 39 or 40 weeks. It just seemed impossible!
This week, I cannot describe to you in a single word how badly I want to flop down on the bed on my stomach. Even, right now- as I type this- I have an overwhelming desire to turn over on my belly, stretch out with the computer in front of me, and continue talking to you all.
Plus, the fact that my fingers are too swollen for even my fake wedding ring makes me miss wearing me original one that much more.
Every day that I wake up still pregnant is more and more frustrating. My mom keeps telling me, "You knew how long it took!" and she's right; I did. But, that doesn't keep me from being anxious to hold my child in my arms. It doesn't keep me from wanting to get rid of these extra 27 pounds as fast as humanly possible. It doesn't keep me from wanting to be able to get out of bed in the middle of the night to pee without having a death-grip on Hubby's arm from the pain in my pelvic bones. Nope, nope, nope. I just want my baby.
I know that all the crying will eventually stop. The random rants and raves I go through throughout the day with cease. And the feeling of being overwhelmed with things to get done before the baby comes will be replaced with the feeling of overwhelming love and joy that he's finally here with me.
Last night was the most disappointing night so far. All day yesterday I felt weird, and jittery, and overall couldn't concentrate on anything. I was so anxiety ridden that I was in the middle of talking to Jon about how badly I wanted pancakes and just started bawling my eyes out.
We went to IHOP for dinner to apease my craving, which I rarely do but, I guess it's about time that I ate something besides pineapple.... After dinner we got home and put a few more baby things away, talked, and got cozy in bed. Around that time, I realized that my stomach had been kinda crampy all day. I have been having cramps that feel like menstruation for the last couple of weeks, but these were worse. The longer I laid there and tried to sleep, the more aware I was that I was having contractions (11.30 P.M.). (Although, I stayed in denial about the whole thing until Jon talked me into it...)
The contractions lasted ALL night. Actual sleep was rare and when I did fall asleep I usually woke back up, after just a short time, in a panic and my abs cramping worse than before. By the time Hubby's alarm went off this morning I was already wide awake and still having contractions. Ate breakfast? Still contractions. Went for a walk? Still contractions. Real ones too; not the braxton hicks nonsense that drives some women up a wall.
Jon even timed me, in his own secretive way, and all of my labor "signs" were in line with everything we had read, heard, and learned. I was so hoping that they would last throughout the day and that, instead of being here and writing this blog post right now, I'd be at the hospital delivering my baby this evening.
Unfortunately, at around 9:30 A.M. they just stopped. Cold turkey.
So that's where we are folks. Stuck between a rock and a baby bump.
I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and hopefully he will at least be able to tell me that my measurements have made some improvement. However, I'm starting to believe that progression in a doctor's eyes is 'a few fries short of a happy meal' in order to be satisfactory to someone who is only 1 week + 4 days from her due date.